What NOT To Write On Your ‘About Us’ Page

16/03/2012

By Jackie Barrie, Copywriter, Trainer & Author at Comms Plus

With thanks to Doug Jenner who inspired part of this article (and is featured in this month’s copywriter profile), here are some typical examples of what NOT to write on your ‘About’ page, and my explanation of why it’s not helping your marketing effort if you do.

“We are passionate about what we do”

Who cares? Even when writing about yourself or your business, you have to answer ‘what’s in it for me’ from the client’s perspective. They don’t care about your passion or lack of it. I regularly pass a baker’s in...

...my local High Street that claims to be ‘passionate about bread’. I don’t believe them! Nobody, but nobody, is passionate about bread. And, whatever they say, it doesn’t tempt me in to buy a loaf. In my view, ‘passion’ should be saved for the bedroom (or the kitchen table...). It is an overused and irrelevant word in business.

“We are highly respected”

Then prove it with testimonials and case studies. What other people say about you is more convincing than anything you can say yourself.

“We are proud that…”

Who cares how proud you are? We only care what you can do for us.

“We provide traditional and old-fashioned service”

Don’t be general; be specific. Give examples. And only ever state things that are important to your customers.

“We provide flexible, personal, tailor-made service”

Yes, that’s what service should be. Again, don’t just tell us; show us what you mean.

“Our clients have distinctly discerning and bespoke needs”

Of course they do, we all do. Do you have any clients that are exactly like me? What did you do for them? Were they happy with the results? Will you be able to do the same for me? That’s all customers care about.

“Our clients are small... continued on page two >

 

 

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